Remote controls are straight up trolling us.
They develop legs the second you look away. You place one on the coffee table while grabbing a snack, and when you return it's relocated to another dimension. The couch cushions become a black hole. The space between the armrest and the seat turns into a Bermuda Triangle for anything with batteries.
Scientists haven't studied this phenomenon enough if you ask me. But I have a working theory that makes perfect sense once you think about it.
Morning brain fog is the real villain here.
Before that first cup hits your system, you're basically a zombie with a to-do list. Your hand moves the remote to some random spot while your brain is still loading like a computer from 1997. You think you left it on the table, but your autopilot mode tucked it behind a throw pillow for reasons only your sleepy brain understands.
The remote didn't vanish. Your memory did.
That magical brown liquid doesn't just wake you up. It brings your short term memory back online. Suddenly you remember weird stuff like where you put things and what day of the week it is. Without it, you're just guessing your way through the morning hoping muscle memory saves you.
Everything makes more sense after coffee. The world gets clearer. Your brain starts working like it's supposed to. Even finding lost remotes becomes possible again because you can actually retrace your steps instead of staring blankly at the couch wondering if you're losing your mind.
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Today’s Coffee Notes: Rwanda
A fine Rwanda coffee offers a silky, creamy body along with the floral notes of Ethiopian Yirgacheffe Coffee and the acidity of a Kenya coffee. The aroma may provide hints of lemon and orange blossom with floral notes complementing the sweet citrus qualities with hints of caramel in the aftertaste.
The sweet flavors of a good Rwandan Bourbon coffee are suggestive of caramelized cane sugar along with spice notes of clove, cinnamon and allspice and rose floral aromas. The buttery creaminess of the body carries into the aftertaste.
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Until your remote reappears,
des
p.s. "check the couch cushions"